The weight of leading my colleagues

As a college student, I have been involved in a lot of things in the name of experiencing. From traversing the streets of town to feel a sense of freedom, to joining funny programs, thinking it might get me out of my parents' home. especially since I am the only one who has never been allowed to stay outside my place and had to commute to school, but the one who gives me the most dread and stress is a leader.
Now we need to note that it has never been my first role kuongoza a section of ma boys n girls. In primary i was a scout commander. When I was in class seven, I became a leader of a prayer house in our school. My deputy was literally a class eight. No one understands how that logic works, but yeah, I guess it was like that. in hightschool i became part of the students' executive board, a cu leader, and a leader of a particular club. My docket as an executive also dealt with clubs. So yeah, I had some level of experience. lakini stuff iko colle jo, ni tofauti. Hadi mtu ana weza sema high school na primary is more of a joke.
I volunteered to be part of a club that I really love and enjoy. And when I was asked to lead, I was all in. Sign me up. I got the role, and it was unique since it was less of consolidated leadership and more of teamwork. And I loved it. until the trials and tribulations came.
Clubs went down in school, and people now see volunteering as more of a nuisance and less of something noble to do. Now I thought it would be something as simple as just checking up on them. wapi, people block the numbers, others leave groups, others just straight up ignore you, it's as if you became those annoying finance agents looking for students to start saving and banking. Not that I have anything against them, but I get the point.
Another thing is planning. I was good at organizing things back in the day lakini ni kama i lost my prime a long time ago. From waking up at 3:00 am to 12:00 at night in the name of Kusomea K.C.S.E to barely waking up at 9:00 am. Mind you classes start at 8:00 am. Anyway back to the clubs, i try to make it for the meetings but either kuna jam kwa barabara, matatu ina tafuta watu or something conviniently comes up. And sometimes i forget to sort out a time for my people and they end up confused. Demoralizing the people am supposed to lead I don't know what happens but it happens.
Another thing that makes me go mad is activites, planning is hectic. From communicating to administration to confirming tranpsort and there are times it won't work out. So now its planning with the patron on finances. doing the maths, sending budgets, accountability reports. I cant take it anymore its too much.
Anyway there are more but this is just a few. Sometimes i feel like to quit lakini hawa watu ni familia siwezi wa abandon and to be fair, nili quit kurudia form four and I feel like na pay for even giving up. Maybe i need to work hard and pull up my socks. Maybe am just at my limit but i don't hear any bills so if it won't kill me, might as well keep at it and do my best hatakama ni pathetic.
But eeeh highschool na primary ni chocha, mimi nimekuja kuelewa siwezi kuwa kiongozi na sitaki kukuwa kiongozi tena juu it demands alot. Soo much that even if there are beneffits to it. Mimi hushindwa with leaders. kama na pata stress ya my small role, and still nikona shida na shule, ni aje wanatakanga kukuwa leaders kwa viti. Anyway food for thought.